What’s up brothas how was your weekend? Have you been sweating out this volatile market without my guidance? Consider yourselves Jason Derulo wannabes because you’ve been ridin solo. Apologies for the leave of absence on my part. I hope you didn’t panic and sell everything you had in the meantime. Because we’ve only just begun!
Before we get to today’s picks….let’s take a trip down memory lane. Let’s take a look at what I’ve given out and how it’s performed. For the sake of this experiment, we’ll assume you bought or sold $1,000 worth of stock at the time of my recommendation.
WINNERS:
BUY $LMT ON 7/19/20 @ $366
Net Loss: $6
BUY $ZBRA ON 7/19/20 @ $276
Current Price: $319
Net Profit: $155
BUY $MSFT ON 7/25/20 @ $204
Current Price: $206
Net Profit: $13
BUY $ESPO ON 8/3/20 @ $58
Current Price: $61
Net Profit: $50
BUY $XYL ON 8/3/20 @ $74
Current Price: $92
Net Profit: $244
BUY $BA ON 8/22/20 @ $178
Current Price: $154
Net Loss: $138
BUY $CGC ON 8/22/20 @ $16.40
Current Price: $20.40
Net Profit: $245
TOTAL PROFIT: $563 (+8%)
Call me Gaylord Focker because my portfolio is looking strong to quite strong. We’re up 8% in a few months time. How is this shit legal? I want a sit-down interview with every former millionaire that has ever went broke. I don’t understand it. You’d literally have to try and flush your money. And don’t get me started with “Well it’s not fair, they should teach you this stuff in schools!” Yeah I agree, but you could also just type your lazy fingers into Google and learn that your money will double over 9 years time at 8% annual interest. And at this rate, we’re on pace to knock down like 25% annual interest (that will never happen). How’s doubling your money every 3 years sound? #TRUSTinSSC
LOSERS:
SELL $TLRY ON 7/19/20 @ $7.10
Current Price: $6.60
Net Savings: $72
SELL $SNAP ON 7/25/20 @ $22.80
Current Price: $41.20
Opportunity Loss: $803
TOTAL OPPORTUNITY LOSS: -$731 (-37%)
OOF. I may have led you slightly astray on Snapchat. My apologies. I can only imagine all zero of you who were holding $SNAP are pissed at me. But in the words of Michael Berry (I think that’s his name), “I may have been early, but I’m not wrong.” There is ZERO shot that snapchat is a sustainable company. Other than an occasional reply chug, nobody is even using their app. Anyone up for a software virus? Head over to the discover tab on Snapchat.
So it’s been quite some time since my last checkin, but if my memory serves me correct, I promised to give out LOSERS for this installment. That’s right, LOSERS. We’re talking ‘sell it if you got it.’ We’re talking Kodak in the month of August.
Whether or not you want to take advice from the guy who told you to sell snapchat when it was worth half of its current price is totally up to you. So take em or leave em. Let’s ride!
LOSER: BABA
Sticking with the same principle as Snapchat here. Who on earth decided Alibaba was the next Amazon and how many times have they taken their laptop to a computer repair store due to the viruses on it? Look at this absolute POS website.
That looks like theft waiting to happen. “Hey there fake Chinese company, here’s my home address and credit card number! Enjoy it!” It looks like a shittier version of eBay. Actually it’s more like one of those wannabe websites where you make a typo in the website URL and you arrive at some BS site. I wouldn’t buy something off that site if they paid me to purchase it.
Back around 2008 I remember scouring some websites for a pair of Nikes I was after. I finally found them on a site that looked remarkably similar to that Alibaba homepage. Little did I know that while I paid for shoes, I was going to get a shower cap mailed to me from Singapore in 3 weeks time. When I told the lady at paypal what I received in the mail she actually apologized TO ME! Told me she was sorry that paypal let the transaction go through and sent me all my money back. That was an all time “alrighty then” moment from me.
In all seriousness, the next time you find yourself wanting to purchase something from Alibaba, maybe give Amazon.com a look-see. Amazon’s website wasn’t designed by someone with the skillset of myself and also your information is stolen by US intelligence agencies as opposed to Chinese intelligence agencies.
I’m fully aware that if you’re looking at the history of that $BABA stock price you probably think I’m insane. But a little known fact is that every day is darkest before dawn bullshit fake company’s share price must inflate before it can come screaming down like a violent plane crash.
Despite the fact that the self-appointed experts and finance douches will tell you that “Alibaba is a real threat to Amazon,” I would like to present this graph that I found with minimal effort from Google Images without any additional comment:
LOSER: ZM
I once heard Bill Burr make a joke that started with something along the lines of “I appreciate a good scam” in reference to those informercials where you buy a 25cent piece for $19.95. I personally couldn’t agree more. And that’s exactly what you’re getting with Zoom Video Communications, Inc. A good ole fashioned scam!
Why use a tried and proven product like Microsoft Teams or Cisco Webex when your business can use this FREE service that you connect to through your web browser (unless you have the computer application downloaded which for whatever reason the people at Zoom tried to make impossible to do)? I am absolutely fascinated that some of our largest universities in the country are voluntarily opting to use this service to save a few bucks. How many security concerns do you need before you will take them seriously? Here’s an article with about 500 if you’re interested.
And let’s not forget these beauties:
A statement from #NYR: pic.twitter.com/Jo1RNmUdrr
— New York Rangers (@NYRangers) April 3, 2020
That is apparently my "someone just interrupted our court proceeding with pornography" face. First and hopefully last time I ever make it.
— Andrew Warren (@AndrewWarrenFL) August 5, 2020
Nothing says “collaboration” like some unsolicited racial slurs and child porn. And keep in mind, this isn’t your grandmother getting hacked by Nigerian princess emails. These are legitimate organizations that are encountering these incidents, or should I say ‘Zoombombings.’ Because you know things are going well for your company when your users are forced to make up a word to describe hackers barging into your meetings. Now, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not well versed in the financials for Zoom. I haven’t cracked open their books. But I’m willing to go out on a limb and say that “Zoombombings” and “1000% stock price increase in less than a year” don’t jive.
I’m honestly at the point where I’d feel safer using Google’s video chat service than Zoom’s. In the grand scheme of things, that’s pretty damn impressive. Google’s been violating my personal privacy for my entire life and Zoom was able to gain all that ground by blasting their free (and unsecured) service all over the place in just a few short months. TRUST IN ZOOM.
Snake’s Stock Corner Disclaimer: I don’t have a GD clue what I’m talking about and if you are considering using any of the above information in your real-life investment strategies then you should seek help at 1-800-GAMBLER.
Даркнет — это закрытая часть сети, доступ к которой с использованием шифрованные соединения, такие как I2P.
В этой среде размещаются как официальные, а также запрещенные ресурсы, среди которых форумы и другие платформы.
Одной из известных онлайн-площадок является Black Sprut, что занималась реализации разных категорий, включая запрещенные вещества.
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Такие ресурсы часто используют анонимные платежи для обеспечения скрытности сделок.
При этом, спецслужбы периодически блокируют основные даркнет-площадки, но вскоре открываются другие ресурсы.
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